Show week is over. But, wow, what an amazing week it was!
There is something about putting on a show that I have never yet been able to replicate in any other way. There is something truly unique about becoming being part of a team creating something magical. And, when that magic creates one of the most beautiful fairy stories of all time, the stage is set for a glorious production.
In the rush of all the adrenaline and nerves kicking in it is all too easy to focus on “getting through it” rather than grasping the chance given to us to enjoy the magic we create. My challenge to myself had been to make the most of every possible moment, to be patient when things inevitably went wrong and not worry about whether I was achieving perfection but to concentrate on enjoying the experience.
So, how did I fare? Well, I wasn’t perfect; I made mistakes. I lost my temper a couple of times – BUT I was much improved from previous years. I did not kick myself when I went wrong but carried on and quickly forgot about it, choosing to focus on all the things that went well instead. And did I remember to enjoy it?
YES!! Oh yes. I tried so hard to channel my nerves into excitement and I think I succeeded. My fellow cast and crew can probably let you know whether I bounced around backstage a little too excitedly but, after the initial opening night nerves, I could not wait to get out there and give it my all. I still felt sick for most of the week but, oh boy, it was worth it. I would do it all again tomorrow if I only could.
Did we create magic? I think so. I think all the little girls in the audience who came dressed as “Belle” would agree. I felt the magic. I felt the great rush of excitement and heard the wonderous applause of the audiences. I fell in love with the beauty and magic of the show all over again; something that I had often lost in rehearsal.
I was living in the moment so much that the end of the final show took me almost by surprise. The loss I felt was far greater than if I had held back or kept thinking of the future. But I had not held back. I had not pulled away. I had given my all and I had lived right there and then in every single minute. I stood there on the stage in front of the audience at that final performance, grinning insanely from intense happiness and crying at the sadness that this moment could never be repeated.
Will I do it all again? Will I put myself in that vulnerable place where experiencing the moment at its fullest means experiencing all emotion, not just joy and happiness? YES, YES, YES!!
Roll on the next big adventure. Until then I’m going to keep living for every minute. Must go, Neverland is calling…